[Untitled]

I've begun to wonder why you asked me out.
You didn't love me and you said it aloud.
Why did I think otherwise, I just don't know.
Maybe it was your eyes and voice which made me believe so.
Am I there to just soothe your heart.
Do you realise you have the power to tear me apart.
You don't love me, even your actions let me know.
I weep miserably when I'm alone, yet I can't seem to let go.
Unimportant is what you sometimes make me feel.
I tell you this, yet it doesn't help me heal.
Am I that bad that love I don't deserve
Why am I made to feel like the girl on your list called "the reserve"?
Even to talk to me, you make it seem like a task.
Because I'm not the girl you love, guess it's too much to ask.
I'm not the one whom you crave to meet.
At times I doubt I'm someone whom you'll happily greet.
On few occasions you make me seem like I'm a burden in your life.
Sometimes your words hurt like I'm being struck with a knife.
You didn't hesitate to breakup with me.
Without remorse, you did it repeatedly.
You patched up only because you heard me cry.
Was it really for real or was it just a lie?
I was scarred once in love, for a while I lost belief.
I thought you loved me enough and I once again believed.
The first time, I thought it went wrong for the existence of "you and me".
Yet still, being "worthy of a partner's love" doesn't seem to be made for me.
I'm scared one day you'll leave me too.
That fear haunts me, no idea what do I do.
I wanted a relationship with more of love and less to fight.
Was my demand unrealistic or was I right?
I thought you'll be by my side; always with me you'll stand.
How was I to know you wouldn't mind leaving my hand.
I broke many barriers when it came to you, thinking you're the one.
How was I to know, one day you wouldn't mind telling "we're done"
You ain't a bad guy, you aren't an evil soul
You can be someone who cares but I'm not the one to whom you'll show.
There are occasions you behave like I matter to you.
But soon come instances when everything just goes.
At times you're simply awesome, I wanna hug and say, "I love you".
But then I think you'll cringe and instead say, "nothing Pochu".
There are moments it's evident I'm not the one with whom "in love" you are.
Though invisible, this reality manages to leave a tiny scar.
All believe I'm lucky to have my partner in you (sometimes I think so too).
What would they say if, you didn't love me, they got to know?
You think that leaving me would hurt me less.
You fail to realise, I can't love again, it isn't like changing a dress.